This weekend, with the assistance of friends and family, I pulled off a big surprise. Tubs is turning forty this February and we didn’t have any plans for a celebration, so I took matters into my own hands and arranged a surprise boys weekend.
In late November 2011, I sent out a group email to Tubs’s closest friends from school, asking if they’d be interested in a boys weekend as a joint celebration to mark the year of their 40th birthdays. Much to my surprise, they all said yes immediately. So the secret planning began. I engaged the assistance of a travel agent once the dates were set, and the flights and hotel booking were arranged. There was much toing and froing of emails to work out the details, and this part of the process took several weeks.
Then planning attention turned to what the boys would do once they arrived in town. Transport to any such activities was going to be an issue as there were going to be 16 blokes, including Tubs. A long boozy lunch was planned for Saturday, followed by pub-crawling late into the night. For Sunday, we settled on a bacon and egg breakfast at our place followed by a three hour stand up paddleboarding session on a local beach, complete with steak sandwich barbecue and a game of beach cricket.
As the big day approached, I had to reveal the secret to more and more people. Tubs began making plans for the weekend, and I had to rapidly undo those plans behind his back, while making last minute arrangements so the real events could unfold. This was no mean feat, as it was going to be a busy weekend and Tubs had committed us to being in several different places on both Saturday and Sunday. Everyone who I told, played along with the faux plans and Tubs remained clueless as to what was in store. I became increasingly anxious that I, or someone else would slip-up, undoing all my hard work in the months leading up. I pounced on my phone (which I kept on silent most of the time) to delete messages, and hid emails in dummy folders in my email inbox. I was careful to ‘log out’ every time I left the computer unattended. It was utterly exhausting!
On Friday, I did the shopping for Sunday’s breakfast and lunch. I stashed cartons of beer under tarpaulins in the shed, wrapped bacon and eggs in bags and put them in the outside fridge. I had my story ready in case Tubs asked what it was all for (in the event he opened the fridge – unlikely, but still possible). I was going to say my brother was storing food for a work function. I even bought a different brand of juice than we usually buy - to give my story more credit!
As folding chairs, eskys and sun shades were arranged, it seemed that things were coming together perfectly. One more sleep until the big day and Tubs still had no idea. I couldn’t wait to see the look on his face!!!
Tubs and I went about our usual Saturday plan of taking the girls to tennis. I encouraged him to go for a run early in the morning, knowing that it would give him the energy he would need to get through the weekend. After tennis we went our separate ways. I left to take the kids ‘to a 4th birthday party on the beach’, and Tubs went home to wait for a mate to pick him up for ‘lunch with a few mates’. He thought he was meeting up with a couple of local mates, and was very excited. Little did he know.
I dropped the kids off at various pre-arranged locations; overnight bags and swimming bags having been delivered the day before so as not to give anything away. I headed for the hotel. I decided to park my car at my father in law’s house, which is opposite the hotel where the big surprise lunch was to take place. I didn’t want to risk Tubs seeing my car in the carpark of the hotel. As I was getting my handbag together on the front seat of the car, I was ‘gob-smacked’ by the sight of Tubs driving up the driveway. I immediately walked toward his car (to stop him getting any closer and seeing the kids weren’t with me), and said I had come to see if his dad had any beach chairs I could take to the 4th birthday party, but that unfortunately the shed was locked so I was ‘about to leave’.
Tubs didn’t question this story for a moment, which was strange given that his dad doesn’t have any folding chairs, and the hard plastic chairs he does have were on the porch right in front of me!!! But why would I lie about such a thing? I asked Tubs what he was doing there, and he said he had popped in to make sure the house was still standing! His dad has been broken in to a few times recently, so this too seemed a plausible story. I climbed back into the car and looked as though I was starting to leave, as I watched Tubs drive back down the driveway.
I immediately telephoned David, our friend who was collecting Tubs to take him to the hotel ‘for lunch’. I told him about my close call and asked him to get Tubs without delay, as everything was in place. I headed over to the hotel, watching every car within sight to make sure Tubs didn’t do another drive by. I couldn’t believe how close I had come to spoiling everything. If Tubs had been just a few seconds later, I would have been walking down his Dad’s driveway or the street and there was no story I could have used to explain what I was doing!
On the trip to the hotel with David, Tubs suggested parking at his Dad’s place, but thankfully David knew better and said he’d rather just park at the hotel. Thank goodness for my last minute phone call to alert him!
To cut a long story short, Tubs walked into the hotel, expecting to meet up with two local friends, but instead found 13 of his closest friends who he has known for over 20 years. His reaction wasn’t what most had expected (we secretly hoped for tears). He appeared deeply shocked and it took over an hour for him to process what was going on. I watched his reaction through the lens of my new video camera, thrilled I would get to share it over and over again. It was after all, the moment most anticipated and relived.
Tubs settled into his boys' weekend as a kid in a lolly shop would. He was deeply honoured by the presence of his closest friends and seized the opportunity to spend time with them. The bond between the boys was such a beautiful thing to see, and I felt privileged to witness parts of their weekend together. Orchestrating it was exciting, exhausting and enormously rewarding. I would do it all again in a heartbeat – only next time, I would remember to press ‘record’ on the video camera.
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